recipe review | new recipe of the week: raw lemon pie macaroons from the tasty alternative

What do you do when life (or Trader Joe's) hands you a bag of lemons (that you purchased)? 

Well, first, you make lemon curd, because that stuff is straight-up delicious.  After that, the world is your oyster (also good with lemons, actually!).

At a recent Saturday work conference, I was stuck in a mid-morning rut: I didn't eat any of the bagels out at breakfast (paleo win!), but lunch was so far away and I wasn't interested in my own emergency snacks.  Thankfully, my dear friend Marisa's lunchbox had cooler snacks than mine, and I happily ate all of her vegan lemon macaroons.

Since I owe her some cookies and I have to use these lemons somehow, I hit up my best friend Google for some inspiration and found The Tasty Alternative's take on vegan lemon macaroons.

Visit the website for the recipe, but here is what it looked like before, during and after.  I halved the recipe and made everything exactly as called for with one exception.  I had no almond flour on hand, so I went with cashew meal, which is a coarser texture.

before: my food processor didn't dig the halved recipe- make a full version if you have a larger processor.

The hardest part about this recipe was getting my super-hot oven to dehydrate the macaroons without burning them. I had two challenges: one, I made the macaroons a little smaller than the recipe called for, which affects cooking time; and two, my aforementioned oven issues.  An hour on my lowest setting cooked the bottoms a little more than I would have liked, but didn't affect the flavor.






The boss take on this recipe? Delicious and worth another try for sure.  The only change I would make is adding more lemon flavor because of how much I've been loving lemon recently.  I have also come across quite a few recipes calling for a dehydrator recently; perhaps that will be my next kitchen investment.  Otherwise, I'll try to find a better balance of oven temperatures.  

You can see that they're a little more "done" than I would like.
Some of the golden brown color is from the use of cashew meal, but it's also from cooking a little too long.

recipe: roasted brussels sprouts! (paleo)

I owe brussels sprouts an apology.

When I first went paleo about five years ago, I committed to cooking with one new vegetable a week.  My dad has always been a picky eater, so there were a ton of things I never tried as a child.  Also, this was 2010, so it was before kale got super popular.  

Brussels sprouts were one of those things that I never tried AND never wanted to try. My mother made them every Thanksgiving because she and my grandma like them, but nothing about them was appealing.  However, eating paleo introduced me to tons of foods I never knew I loved (like cabbage and cauliflower), so I figured, why not Brussels sprouts? 

Well.  I made a Brussels sprouts recipe from a Paleo site that had NEVER failed me. Bacon was even involved. And it was a spectacular fail.  The dish came out technically fine, but I still had such a strong dislike for the poor lil sprouts, I could not eat it.

Fast forward to 2015, and I have finally found a way that I LOVE eating these mini cabbages.  It is similar to my kale chips recipe, and the only way I have found that I like the texture of Brussels sprouts!

the final product, served alongside a grass-fed burger and sauteed tomatoes

why paleo?

Considering the two next posts I have planned for this blog are Paleo recipes, I figured it might be helpful to explain what Paleo is (so you don't have to google) and why I choose to eat this way.  

image credit: http://www.daimanuel.com/2014/06/06/the-paleo-diet-report-free-download/

What is Paleo?

Eating Paleo in a nutshell is: grain-free, dairy-free, legume-free, soy-free, processed-food-free.  Some people call it a "caveman" style of eating, as the goal is to eat the same types of food hunter-gatherers might have eaten.  (Oversimplified: pizza doesn't grow on trees... sadly.  Or, there was no way to process grain prior to industrialization.)

If you want to see it explained more/better, please visit the following links.  These are also the first sites I began to use when I went Paleo 5 years ago:

• Nom Nom Paleo's Paleo 101
• The FAQ from Everyday Paleo
• Primal Blueprint 101 from Mark's Daily Apple (primal and paleo aren't identical, but they have many similar principles)
  

Why eat Paleo?

About five years ago, I was feeling out of shape and frustrated with the solutions I knew how to do.  At the time, I was a teacher, so I was pretty much on my feet all day already.  I was already working out 5-6 days a week; I added on more time to my daily workouts.  I tried cutting down on the amount of sugar I was eating, I tried eating low-fat, I tried Weight Watchers.  And yet I still remained the same weight, just more tired, hungry and cranky. This was pre-the invention of the term hangry, but I would use that term now.

Then through a gym challenge, I discovered Paleo, and to my surprise, it WORKED.  No more counting calories, grams of sugar, or points.  Just eating meat and produce, for the most part.  I had more energy, my workouts felt better, and I felt awesome.  You can hit google to find more "success stories" - there are even people who have used this style of eating to improve chronic illnesses and autoimmune disorders. Luckily, I'm not in this boat, but pretty powerful.

Here's why I like it: after the initial month-long challenge, I realized I like the other stuff way more than I like grains.  Meat sauce tastes just as good without pasta, I was never super crazy about rice, and I found more whole food options for other things (like oatmeal!). I have become a better cook, more imaginative and more skilled, and I LOVE finding ways to remake non-paleo recipes.  So that, combined with feeling much better, has made me more or less a paleo convert.

What it means for me now

I would be lying if I said I was 100% strict paleo.  It is HARD for me to maintain, especially when I am traveling or around people who eat a less varied diet than I do.  It requires a lot of planning, especially because my current job requires a lot of driving (and my car still doesn't have a microwave...2015, try harder), and sometimes I am lazy.

If you read Paleo blogs, a lot of people have figured out a way to make Paleo work for them.  Life is too short to go to Paris and not drown yourself in baguettes and cheese (provided your health permits it), or eat a sweet treat on your birthday, or drink wine.  My current list of "not Paleo, but works for me" are: a little dairy in my coffee, grass-fed butter, wine (duh), and some Paleo-ified baked goods.  I eat good pizza on occasion.  I try local cuisine when I travel, including local beer.  And I still eat more vegetables than 90% of the people I know, so I don't stress about those choices.  My Boss Take: Paleo works for me.  You should try it and see if it works for you.

If you're interested in learning more, comment below or check out some of my favorite sites: PaleOMG, Against All Grain, Primal Palate, or the sites listed above.  Happy eating!

recipe review | new recipe of the week: lemon curd (paleo)

One of my goals is to cook a new recipe every week.  I have my go-to recipes, as do we all, but I love exploring new flavors and cooking techniques. Check back weekly for a new Recipe of the Week! 

I am a lifelong, certified chocoholic, but I have been on a huge citrus kick lately.  Maybe it reminds me of the amazing lemon pastries I sampled in Paris, but it's probably a subconscious desire to prevent scurvy in this long Northeast winter.

After trying (read: finishing far too quickly) Trader Joe's Lemon Curd, I looked at the ingredient list and decided 2 things: 1. I could make this on my own, easily. 2. I could make this with higher-quality ingredients, avoiding refined sugar and processed oils.

With a little help from my best friend Google, I found this Easy Lemon Curd recipe from Savory Lotus and went to work.  The result was a smooth burst of citrus on my spoon.  It was so good, I could definitely eat it in an entire sitting.  I didn't, but let's see if it lasts through the day.

The finished product, minus my healthy quality control sample

This recipe was definitely easy to make, as promised, and I had the hardest time letting it cool and thicken overnight...that's how much I wanted to eat it!  You can click the link above for the recipe.  One thing I will say is: make sure you beat your eggs THOROUGHLY before adding to the mixture, and keep your heat on low as the recipe says.  I don't have any photos of the cooking process, but I definitely had to strain some scrambled egg whites out of my curd.  What can I say, I was just too excited to have lemon deliciousness in my life.

Easiest way of eating: by the jarful. I mean, spoonful.

While I have already copped to eating far too much of this on its own, this lemon curd would go great in baked goods, with fresh fruit, or maybe even stirred into some oatmeal.  This recipe will go into my "Definitely make again" queue, as well as the "Things I probably shouldn't know how to make" list.  Darn you, sweet tooth!

The bossyenglish Boss Take: definitely make this. Your scurvy-free self can thank me later!

recipe: pumpkin porridge!

Unless it involves snow days (and thus days off from work/school), I do not like winter. I hate being cold, I hate wearing socks, I hate short days with less sunshine, and I hate that I spend less time outside.  Good thing my family and loved ones almost all live in the Northeast! Thanks guys!

But winter weather always means soups and chilis and oatmeal- dishes that warm from the inside while I put on another pair of stupid socks and crank up the heat.  Since going mostly Paleo a few years ago, I have missed out on my beloved oatmeal and Kashi has missed out on my many dollars of oatmeal purchases.

After spending an inordinate amount of time on the Internet looking for a way to re-create oatmeal sans oats (fauxtmeal, anyone?!), I came up with a satisfying, nutrient-packed mixture that also tastes delicious.

Take that, winter weather!

Pumpkin Porridge/Fauxtmeal

This is for one serving, but it is super easy to make this ahead or multiply and make for more!

Ingredients:

• 1/4 c canned pumpkin
• 1/2 c canned coconut milk (works best if it's full fat)
• 2-3 tbsp ground flax seeds
• 2 tbsp finely shredded coconut
• 1-2 tsp maple syrup (optional)
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 1 tsp cinnamon
• 1 tsp coconut oil or butter
• 2 eggs, beaten
• Optional toppings: syrup, frozen berries, crushed walnuts/pecans/almonds

Instructions:

• In a small mixing bowl, combine pumpkin, coconut milk, flax seeds, shredded coconut, syrup if using, vanilla extract, and cinnamon.
• In a separate bowl, beat the eggs
• Place a small saucepan on medium heat.  Allow coconut oil or butter to melt and coat the pan.  (This prevents the porridge mixture from sticking if it gets too hot)
• Add porridge mixture to saucepan.  Stir occasionally and let come to a boil.
• Take pan off heat.  Add beaten eggs to heated porridge.  Mix constantly for 1 minute- if you let the eggs sit too long, you will get scrambled eggs in your "oatmeal."
• Once the eggs are beaten in, return the pan to low-medium heat.  Continue to stir for 2-3 minutes.
• Take off heat, enjoy in bowl with desired toppings!

Notes/Substitutions:

• You can use applesauce or a mashed-up banana in place of the pumpkin.  I think bananas are gross and I'm allergic, but I know that applesauce works.
• If you want to use a different milk, just know that the fat in the coconut milk is what gives this a nice creamy texture.

Now back to hiding under a pile of blankets wishing for a beach vacation!

2014: the year I quit shampoo

As the previous post mentioned, 2014 was a pretty cool year for numerous reasons.  One of my notable accomplishments (or something I'm proud of that I tell everyone about, but no one really cares and they're just stuck listening...one of those things for sure) was that I quit shampoo.

I have always been meticulous about making sure my hair looked and felt clean and presentable.  With baby-fine blonde hair, prone to getting oily quickly, that meant shampooing often.  I was the poster child for lather, rinse, repeat.  And then repeat again until you're convinced your hair will look clean.  Not only did greasy hair FEEL gross, it also made my bright blonde hair look much darker..not a fun look.  So how did a Suave-clarifying-shampoo-obsessed woman quit shampoo?

After deciding to visit Costa Rica, I made a snap decision to honor the country's commitment to sustainable tourism by quitting shampoo in favor of more natural products with fewer synthetic chemicals.  (By the way, visiting Costa Rica was also done on a whim.  I like to live like Andy Dwyer on Parks and Recreation.)

Following a month of epic hair failure while using Dr. Bronner's liquid soap as a shampoo--note to everyone, if you have hard water, do not use Dr. Bronner's as shampoo, it will not. end. well.--I finally stumbled on something that worked.  Enter the baking soda & vinegar phase of my life.  I guess my life is like a middle school science experiment?

Before describing what I do and how I figured it out, I will share a little proof with you of how well it works.  Here is a look at my hair today, Thursday.  I washed my hair on Sunday.  I haven't washed it since then.  Then I went to the gym today (STOP JUDGING I WILL GO MORE NEXT WEEK).  Here is a post-gym, no-wash-since-Sunday photo of my hair:

I wish I could go back in time and show myself this as a WAY better option than lather, rinse, repeat and repeat with sulfate and paraben-laden Suave shampoos.  No-poo is more environmentally friendly, more wallet-friendly, and more time-saving-friendly method of hair care.  So, here's what works for me:

• Wash my hair with about 1-2 tablespoons of baking soda dissolved in warm water.  Shake it up, put on hair, massage in, let sit for a minute.  Then I use my fingers to massage my scalp and rinse out.
• Spray my scalp with a 50/50 mixture of Bragg's Apple Cider Vinegar and water.  I add a couple of drops of rosemary essential oil because it is good for the scalp.  Let sit for a minute, then rinse.
• Condition from my shoulders to the ends of my hair with diluted Dr. Bronner's conditioning rinse.  I dilute mine extra because my hair is so fine.

And voila!  No lathering, rinsing or repeating.  I now have the opposite problem- I like to see how long I can go without washing my hair with it still looking clean.  Mega turbo props to the Almost Exactly blog, which got me through my most horrifying, "why isn't my hair clean/dry/detangled/pretty" moments, and is an ongoing inspiration in DIY/natural hair and skin care!

Here's an inside look at the MVPs of my no-poo process:

Clockwise from top left: 

1. Mini bottles for EVERYTHING.  Essential when you make your own haircare products and also nice for travel!

2. Dr. Bronner's Organic Shikakai Conditioning Rinse: I went 5 months without conditioning my hair until I found this product!  My hair needs less conditioner now that I'm not stripping it of oils with traditional shampoo, but my ends are looking much healthier thanks to this.

3. A wide tooth comb and my boar bristle hairbrush: the comb detangles my hair when wet and pulls out much less hair than my old paddle brush.  The boar bristle brush adds shine and helps pull your hair's naturally occurring oils from your scalp all through the length.

4. Klorane's dry shampoo.  Ok, technically this isn't no-poo, nor is it as natural as everything else, but it is the BEST.  It absorbs any excess oil without the gross "there's dry shampoo in my hair" feeling.

So... what do you think of no poo?  And more importantly, did you know a person could write this much about their own hair?  I didn't until now!

Hello, reader.

Welcome! 

This blog is mostly for me (possibly for my dearest friends, and maybe my mother).  I have never been good at journaling--nor do I expect to be a regular updater here--but maybe I will be better at typing up random recaps of my life and things I love than I was at writing about stupid teenage angst.

While I don't believe in New Year's Resolutions, I realized that 2014 was a pretty badass year in Bossy English-land.  Highlights included traveling to Paris--a lifelong dream of mine, Costa Rica, and Denmark; completing my coursework to become a school leader; and reconnecting with lifelong friends.

As I was ringing in the New Year among friends and firework-crazy Danes (more on that later) I thought: I should really write some of this down.  My elephantine memory won't last forever. 

Expect to read a lot of random ramblings here, including:

• Travel stories
• Paleo recipe recaps
• Social justice-y rants
• My attempts at more healthy, natural living: aka being a modern hippie
• Occasional wit

If you're my friends or mother, thanks for putting up with me in another medium.  To rando internet land- I don't know how you found this silly blog, but I hope you enjoy reading it.